The Crawling Dervish

I hear there’s a party going on, ladies, so somebody break out the polyester and breath mints! Happy blogoversary, Ado and Alison, and here’s a little about why this is my favorite SFB post (at least, so far)…

I haven’t been writing this blog for that long (with my hiatus in the fall, about seven months), but this is one of my favorite early posts. It may seem like an odd choice. It’s short, and kind of sarcastic, and doesn’t say that much about who I am as a writer or even necessarily what this blog is about (which, when I figure it out, I’ll let you know). But what it does (for me, anyway) is make light of all the conflicting emotions I had as a first-time mom at that exact moment in time. For a while there, it was difficult for me to find laughter through the PPD/anxiety, and blogging has become an effective (and addictive) outlet. Writing helped me remember who I am as a person and not just a mother, and how to be a smart-ass and laugh at myself again. The picture of Dane at the bottom, at nine months old – as he had just crawled under all of my clothes like a tunnel and then peered out with utter glee – is a moment I wish I could replay every day for the rest of my life. Funny, lovey baby.

Happy Blogoversary, Ado and Alison! Thanks for the inspiration to write and keep writing, and wishing you many, many more!


So this morning I:

– Dressed my child in a swim diaper because for the third day in a row I forgot to bring the new box of diapers in from the car;
– Tried every toy in the playroom to discover my child only wanted to play with the laundry, my shoes, a Huggies box, a six-pack of toilet paper and a plastic Gap bag;
– Refolded the same basket of laundry 4 times;
– Had squash/carrot sneezed onto my last clean white shirt, and;
– Knocked over an entire display case at Whole Foods with one artful swing of a tiny pudgy hand.

This afternoon, I would like to:

– Down a pitcher of margaritas;
– Lay by the pool in a vegetative state for fifteen uninterrupted minutes;
– Take up smoking;
– Or maybe cocaine, and;
– Run Raffi over with his little red wagon.

But then I would miss this:

And frankly, that would suck.

Smooch -s

Blog Bash


10 thoughts on “The Crawling Dervish

  1. Oh, My. Now. This is my kind of post!
    So so glad you linked up and thank you for celebrating with us. After reading your post – I want to lay about by that pool with you, and take up smoking or something truly bad for me, too!
    Glad you made it through the PPD.
    This post was a great choice. (-:

    • Glad you liked it. I was a little nervous because it’s not my most, hmmmm, “literary” writing!! But I love the captured moment of remembering who I was after a loving but tough early go of it, and I’m so happy I’m getting the chance to share that again!

      You’re welcome to hang out at my pool any time!

    • Great! It’s not my most “lyrical” post but it really does make me laugh when I remember that moment – the “coming out of early motherhood” moment. So glad to link up with you two and enjoy the party!

  2. What a CUTIE!! Love the photo and I can completely relate to both your feelings in the post and in the intro. I’m just back to blogging after my third baby, and it is so wonderful to have something for ME, even if the writing is all about them. 🙂

    • thanks, and yes! that is exactly how i feel! i spend so much time in diapers and sign language that an hour a day of writing makes me feel like an adult again. so glad you like it!


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